When you travel, if you've done any kind of travelling, there is this really interesting phenomenon that inevitably happens. If you're lucky, and you're doing it right, you tend to meet a lot of people. Whether they are strangers on the street or at a museum or tourist site, they may also be people that you stay with or even fellow travellers staying at your hotel, resort, or hostel. You meet these people and after a few minutes you've gone through the usual run-down of questions: where are you from, what brings you to (insert name of place you are here), how long have you been travelling, where else have you been or plan to go, what do you do back home?
You know, the basics. And as you're getting a feel for one another one of two things will happen next. You either part ways, sometimes for a variety of reasons - one of you is moving on to your next activity or event, or sometimes that basic introductory chatting is all you need from one another. The other thing that happens, if you're lucky enough, if you play your cards right, you make a new friend.
When you travel, odds are, at one time or another you are going to be in close quarters with strangers and that forces you to do one of two things: ignore said strangers or make friends. Within a few minutes, hours, days you make some of the best friends you may ever meet in your life. Because the conversation extends past where you're from or what you're doing there and crosses into topics like politics or worldview or even completely random, inconsequential topics like that infamous Oscars selfie or that time someone thought they were rolling a joint on the street when in fact they were just rolling a cigarette. Okay, maybe it wasn't just that time. In fact, it's every time. And after hanging around with my fair share of Europeans I have seen that most smoke "rollies" versus a pack bought at the gas station. So, the looks they get when making a cigarette while waiting at the bus stop is almost priceless.
You learn about your new friends lives back at home and what they do for a living. You learn about the music students that they teach back in Scotland and how your new friend attends all her students performances, even if they're outside of school hours. You learn that your friend once worked with "Buddy" - the Cake Boss himself. You learn about your friends broken families back in the UK but how everyone is rooting for them on their travels. You learn about divorce and the struggle to find an identity from your friends in New Orleans. You learn about a relationship with God that has directed your new friend from Oklahoma to where she is today. You learn about a genuine love for Halloween from your friend in Connecticut. You learn all sorts of things from how a firehouse works to stages of pregnancy and planning a wedding from your friends in Wyoming. You learn about the art behind tattooing from your friends in Fresno. You learn things about people that you may have only met a day ago that you might not ever know about friends you've had your entire life. And it's amazing.
When you're surrounded by strangers, you have two choices - you either make friends or you don't. When you do make friends, you make fast friends. A condensed friendship that has to live its life in a matter of days or weeks or sometimes even hours. And when those hours, or days, or weeks are up you have say goodbye. It might not hit you right away because you've gotten so used to having these new friends around that the reality that it is entirely possible that you will never see these people again for the rest of your life, by the time that sinks in, it's already too late. Because you've said goodbye but you didn't really accept the fact that that goodbye meant forever.
In honour of two of the people I became closest with on the second leg of this trip heading back home to England today, I would like to recognize the goodbyes that I have had to say already. The many, many goodbyes. And the inevitable ones I will have to say in the coming weeks. It's a crazy phenomenon how spending so little time with people can impact your life but impact it does. And impact they do. Wishing my friends Beth and Jem safe travels back to Hebden Bridge, England and here's to hoping that this goodbye won't be a forever goodbye.
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